In class, we outlined the paragraph, noting how the main claim is broken down into smaller, more specific ideas with textual support and new perspectives or ideas at each turn. The following outline is based on our collaborative work in class:
I. Major Claim: Miss Brill's Sunday visits to the park help her to cope with lonelinessFor the sake of brevity and focus, I have left off the transitional sentence at the end of the paragraph--however, the transition is an important part of the paragraph and not to be neglected.
A. She enjoys these outings
B. Her time at the park gets her out of her apartment
C. Her time at the park provides her with company
1. Listening to other people makes her feel included in their lives
2. She notices other people, and feels that they might notice her
E. These visits to the park give her a sense of imagined community, even family
F. For these reasons, her trips to the park allow her to escape the isolation of her life
This model paragraph comes from the web site of Randy Rambo, an instructor at another college. You can find Mr. Rambo's remarks on paragraph organization here; the main page of his site also lists a number of other composition-related topics that you may find useful.